Cindy Lou

Journal to share my thoughts and daily events with friends and family
in my journey through Acute Myelogenous Leukemia (AML).

Friday, August 25, 2006

another bad news day

Well guys, got another shot in the gut around suppertime. PA Vanessa came in to tell me my blood tested positive for CMV which is a virus that most of us carry around with us and it doesn'tbother us unless we are immune compromised. I guess they ran the test earlier and it came back equivocal so they ran it again and got results tonight. It means I have to stay 2 more weeks, which I think is the hardest part for me because I just want to go home. I have to stay because they have to watch my electrolyte levels very closely while they treat it. I will probably need IV Potassium, etc daily until they get the med right. So please say some prayers that will carry me through these next 2 weeks with the determination to stay the course. I know I have to it is just hard to think of it in those terms. One day at a time............I CAN DO THIS

posted by Cindy Lou @ 7:45 PM  

12 Comments:

  • At 9:40 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Hi Cindy ,
    we'll all keep praying for you .Your determination and faith will help you get through this.Take care and remember we're all thinking of you.
    Linda p.

     

  • At 10:19 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    HI CINDY
    SO SORRY TO HEAR THAT BAD NEWS. I TALKED WITH KYLE AND HE REALLY SOUNDED DEJECTED---EVERY TIME HE COMES HOME HE GETS A PHONE CALL THAT SOMETHING ELSE POPS IT'S UGLY HEAD UP TO GIVE YOU ANOTHER PROBLEM. BUT WITH ALL THESE SETBACKS YOU ARE BUILDING UP MORE STRENGTH AND DETERMINATION TO CARRY YOU ON THROUGH TO THAT DAY WHEN THEY SAY YOU CAN GO HOME. IT WILL COME---BUT JUST A LITTLE LONGER THAN EXPECTED. SO HANG IN THERE. WE WILL KEEP THE PRAYERS COMING.
    LUV YA--MOM ROTH AND RALPH

     

  • At 10:32 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    CINDY, I AM SOOOO SORRY TO HEAR ABOUT YOUR SET BACK. I CAN ONLY IMAGINE HOW FRUSTRATED YOU ARE FEELING. DIG DOWN DEEP AND USE YOUR AMAZING INNTERSTRENGHT! YOU ARE A DETERMINDED LADY AND HAVE FACED ALOT OF CHALLENGES AND HAVE WON!! YOU WILL WIN THIS ONE ALSO! YOU ARE LOVED BY ALOT OF FAMILY AND FRINDS AND ALL OF THEIR PRAYERS AND LOVE ARE WITH YOU ALL THE TIME. THINK ABOUT THE LINE IN THE POEM FOOTPRINTS, WHEN THE PERSON ASK WHY THERE WAS ONLY ONE SET OF FOOTPRINTS IN THE SAND AND GOD SAID THAT IS BECAUSE I WAS CARRYING YOU. CINDY WE ARE ALL HERE TO CARRING YOU WHEN THE JOURNREY GETS TO BE TO HARD. YOU CAN DO THIS, YES YOU CAN!! LOVE AND PRAYERS ARE BEING SENT YOUR WAY. LOVE, DIANA

     

  • At 10:33 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Cindy,
    For some reason, God has decided to make this a real challenge for you. Just think of it as a character builder. You have come so far, so now is not the time to quit. You "CAN" do this. We continue to pray for all of you. Your day will come, and we will all be there to cheer you on.
    Love,
    Mark and Jan

     

  • At 11:27 PM, Blogger Kyle Roth said…

    Mom, just keep your spirits up and keep doing the things you need to do to get out, like walking.

    Looks like we will have to bring Liv to see you! From what I hear, the nurses say we are able to bring her up to meet you in the community room.

    See you soon ;)

    Love you,
    Kyle, Erika, Kade and Liv

     

  • At 6:42 AM, Blogger Saroth said…

    Cindy,

    Another detour for the Magic School bus, but keep in mind detours always get you home it just takes a little longer. I know that I can not even come close to understanding the magnitude of your emotions that you are going through on your journey and I am sorry about that. But I hope at some point that maybe I will find words that will encourage you to keep the faith. So lean on, trust in and be confident that the Lord has a plan for you. Maybe it is to remind all of us that we have grace, we are strong, we can be immovable and determined when faced with adverstiy. Cindy you are so couragous and I am in awe of how you keep fighting. So keep believing and we will keep praying and sending positive healing thougths to you and your family.
    Love and Prayers,
    Jude, Shelly, Bryce and Shai

     

  • At 9:51 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Cindy:
    I am sorry to hear your news. I know you'll beat this. You are an amazing person and I continue to be in awe of how many people are thinking of you and praying for you. Take care.
    Jeanne

     

  • At 10:33 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Hey Bella, it's time to dig down deep now and focus on NOTHING other than fighting this infection. Not thinking about when you're coming home and not when you're going to hold Liv. You're going to do all that and more, but there isn't a timeline. You can not let down now. You can't feel defeated or that you're sick of fighting or feel sorry for yourself. God knows you have every right to, but that won't work and that's not YOU. Get mad, get even! Get out of that bed to even just walk to the door and back. Hang on to the bed and swing your legs. Don't lay in there and be sad and think about what you're missing or not able to do. There is something you HAVE to do and that's FIGHT, so just do it! You've been through the shock of the diagnosis, the chemo, the hallucinations,the vomiting, weakness, med reactions, breathing problems, fluid around the heart and now they have added to this miserable list an infection. You have to fight like hell to get this out of your body. Now more than ever, it's mindset. Kill it and move on. Whatever they have brought to you before, you have conquered and won. It's one more thing, but one more thing you can win. Let em bring it on, lace up the gloves and fight your way out! YES I CAN!

     

  • At 12:19 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Hi Cindy,
    I'm running out of thoughts of my own so I am sending this blog entry of Melody Ross (she's a celebrity scrapbooker who own's Chatterbox) She has been through some tough times too. Her husband was in an bad accident about 18 months ago and they are still dealing with it's after effects. I thought of you and Kyle when I read it.

    We Might Wobble, But We Don't Stay Down....

    “Love works in miracles every day: such as weakening the strong, and strengthening the weak; making fools of the wise, and wise men of fools; favouring the passions, destroying reason, and in a word, turning everything topsy-turvy.” -Marguerite De Valois

    Do you know what is a miracle to me? What people make it through.....

    Life sometimes hands out blows that seem inconcievably harsh....and, you sure can tell a lot about a person when you see how they handle those blows. I have seen people make it through so much sorrow and hardship and disappointment...and just hop back up and keep going.....maybe through tear-filled eyes, and with scraped-up knees, but they get up and keep moving......life made 'em wobble, but they didn't fall down.....

    And...I really believe that we are all like Weebles...remember those? I remember the commercials about this toy when I was a kid....and then we got some for Christmas....and it amazed me that no matter what you did, how hard you tried to get them to lay down or stay down.....they would always pop back up and upright.....

    Once we taped their heads to the floor with masking tape....just to get them to stay down....but, as soon as we took the tape off...BLOOP...there they were!!! back upright!!!....wobbling then settling into a straight upright position........

    I know for sure that things happen in life that tape me to the ground....but my Spirit still has everything in it to stand straight up......pointing towards Heaven....no matter what happens, how much things get to wobbling, I'll never stay down.....and, neither will you.....we are just not made that way....we are made to always get back up. There's always that something inside of us that we can dig deep for that will make us BLOOOOOP right back up when anything and everything tries to hold us down.

    Remember that...don't ever forget it....please don't let me forget it, either.
    Melody

    Yes Bella, you can. And you WILL very soon.
    (((hugs ))) and prayers,
    Daleen

     

  • At 12:54 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Dear Cindy & Kyle,

    Prayers are ever constant. YOU WILL BEAT THIS AND YOU WILL DRIVE THAT MAGIC SCHOOL BUS BACK TO SANDUSKY.

    Love & prayers,
    Ed & Cindy

     

  • At 1:06 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    CONGRATULATIONS! Everyone, on the birth of beautiful baby Liv. Enjoyed the photos. I don't know,Kade may have been havin the same thought Drew had when he first saw Halle. What a wonderful family. Abb, keep your focus on your healing and everything else will come. The Roth's are conquering and miracles are happening. Sending positive thoughts & energy with prayer to all.
    Love, Val

     

  • At 5:16 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Cindy: Keep believing in yourself!
    Through all of this you have given those of us without the strength to become stronger. As you heal, you also give us weaker folks a lesson in faith and gratitude and relentlous strength. This illness that you have conquered (except for a minor detour or two--easy for me to say) has not only made you stronger it has given everyone who loves you a lesson in courage. No one that I have eve known shows such grace and courage.
    You are almost there Cindy-you are cancer-free and although this road you are now on isn't quite paved yet, the rainbow is closer every day. You are truly and inspiration to me to be a better person and live life to the fullest. Thank you for that. Be strong just a little longer and we are praying everyday that God lessons your load and spreads it around a bit more evenly. Love Chico and Char

     

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